For all of you wives/moms out there

Yesterday, I was able to attend our church's "Mom's REST stop" for the first time. A group of moms, mostly in their 20's and 30's, get together every other week at the church with free childcare provided by older women in the church and do various things like crafts, Bible studies, and prayer time. Yesterday they had a guest speaker, a lady who was in her 40's and a mother of 3, the last of which was a "surprise" and is a little over a year old. I had met her several times before in-between services when she and I both used to give our little ones a midmorning snack. My impression of her was that she was one of those "granola", ultra-feminist types, and that really is how she carries herself. However, she spoke about how to be a Biblical woman, mostly focusing on our roles as wives, and I was impressed and encouraged by her talk, and filled with respect over the way she presented a Biblical view of how a woman should act that is completely anti-cultural. I'll highlight just a couple of things that really struck me.

First, she mentioned that she believes that women have a special place in God's heart (though we're saved with the same grace as men), and cited several verses that supported her opinion, one of which was Isaiah 40:11, "Like a shepherd He will tend his flock, In His arm He will gather the lambs and carry them in His bosom; He will gently lead the nursing ewes." That whole chapter is my favorite portion of scripture, but I had never thought about that last line before. God especially singles out mothers and "gently leads" them! How encouraging!

Secondly, she talked about Ephesians 5:22-33 where it mentions how a woman should submit to and respect her husband. Not a very popular passage in this day and age, she pointed out. But she gave some very encouraging, practical tips on how to live that out:

* find some way(s) to praise your husband every single day and let him know how you admire him
* don't try to "fix" him by correcting his attitudes and behavior; that's God's job, not yours
* don't criticize him; that's also not your job, but Satan's
* ask him for advice whenever you can, even if you don't feel like you need it; his opinion and wisdom will certainly help you, and he will feel needed by you (which he is!)

She gave an example from her own life to illustrate some of these things: her husband loves books, so much so that he has over 3,500 books in their 1000sq.ft. house. They don't have enough bookshelves (or room for more shelves), so he stacks the books on the floor. They also have a 15-month-old daughter -- you can imagine the combination! Whenever her husband gets upset about his books being messed with and she feels the urge to scream, "You're being selfish and crazy!", she prays for forgiveness and the grace to respect her husband, regardless of his faults, and resolves to try to discipline her daughter better so that she doesn't mess with her daddy's books. I found that striking because it seems to me like she's got every right in the world to be upset at him, but instead of criticizing him herself, she lets God do the work through her respectful and kind actions. And she said the result when she does this kind of thing is that her husband realizes on his own that he's being selfish and wants to do better.

This kind of attitude goes along perfectly with what God says in 1 Peter 3:1-7, "Wives in the same way [as being obedient to Christ], be submissive to your husbands, so that...they may be one over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come [merely] from outward adornment...Instead it should be that of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight..."

I was impressed by the fact that this strong, independent, self-sufficient woman would be saying these things! I figured if she can do it, maybe I can be a better Biblical woman for my own husband. I certainly pray that God will help me with that.